Wednesday, August 20, 2008

If it weren't for that horse......

I am pretty sure the only way I will get these posts done is to put on MTV Hits and listen to all the bad music they play and stupid people they put in front of a camera until I finish the latestet post. I wish we got MTV Jams in the OC. In regards to my post about "reading" yesterday, everything seem to be better now. No more pain, thankfully.

Tomorrow morning I go for my physical. I am looking forward to it. I want to know where I am starting and cannot wait to see how this turns out. I am a little nervous about it now as I read a long email from a friend (who is a nutritionist) about the right and wrong ways to lose weight. I am pretty sure I am going about this the right way.

Today I went to work. I was supposed to be in the Children's section again, but avoided it as it was not busy. Instead I worked in the bedding/bath section with my good friend again. It is very weird, there is an elderly lady who works in the bedding section that has been accused of senility. I am happy to report, she readily confirmed her insanity today. My friend asked her about her marriages (she's been married 5 times). The following is the conversation we had when she said she married for the 1st time when she was 20 years old (this is more or less the exact exchange, honestly, I am not creative enough to make up what she said):

Me: "Was it a shotgun wedding?"
The Crazy Lady (TCL): "Sort of, not really, well, they had a really nice house and they were rich. I made the mistake of marrying rich."
Me: "It was only sort of?"

A few random lines of chatter, but no explanation of "sort of shotgun wedding", then:

TCL: "I had 4 kids with him and 3 miscarriages in 6 years."
Me: "Wow, you guys got busy."
TCL: "The pill doesn't work on me. I took it but still got pregnant."

Many thoughts ran through my mind at this point, but I got distracted by my friend hiding behind a post dieing of laughter so TCL would not see her. Then out of nowhere:

TCL: "I had a watch, but because of the earthquake, it stopped working. I didn't wear it for a day, then it worked again, but then the battery died."
Me: "Yeah, earthquakes do a lot of damage to watches."
TCL: "I know, after the earthquakes, it stopped."

I have been trying not to swear on this blog, but really WHAT THE FUCK DOES THAT MEAN? How does an earthquake make a watch stop working? Maybe I missed a day in science class that explains the correlation between plate tectonics and the inner working of a watch. Does anyone know how this works? She then goes on to explain:

TCL: "I can't wear metal watch bands or bracelets because my skin eats the metal."
Me (thoroughly confused at this point and trying not to laugh at TCL or laugh because my friend can barely contain herself): "Is your skin acidic?"
TCL: "Yes, I can only use certain lotion."

At this point, my head was tilted as far as it could go to one side, I was confused almost to the point of mental breakdown and had to walk away. I really don't know what else to say about this, but really felt the need to share it with you.

Enough about work, and enough of this horrible music. I'm going back to SportsCenter. Enjoy your health and your non-acidic skin (if you have acidic skin, I apologize).