Sunday, October 5, 2008

Day 34 & 35

Net loss this weekend - 0.4, total - 33.8

Yesterday, I went to San Diego with DM for a friend's b-day. It was pretty nice except that it started raining. We went out to some bars in the Gaslamp Quarter (which is an awesome place and you can check it out here)and even went to The Haunted Hotel. I have to say, overall, it was not that scary (you can check out here), and we had to wait in the rain, but by the time we left, the rain had stopped. The night was fun and it was good to go out with some friends. There was something interesting that I noticed that I want to talk about.

We met one of people at his downtown apartment that was about a mile from where we went. As it was a nice night out, we decided to walk to the Gaslamp. Had it been before my diet, I would have been worried about this but most likely, I would not have said anything. The worry would stem from me not being able to keep up and being out of shape and I would feel bad for walking slow and being out of breath. Amazingly, this did not happen. Granted, DM and the other guy walked really fast and I had to nearly run to keep up, but that's the thing, I did keep up, for the most part. By the time we got to the first bar, I was not out of breath and I was not sweating. If it had been 2 months ago, I would have lagged a lot, I would have been out of breath, and I would have been sweating a lot (which would have made me worried about smelling bad). I was shocked to realize that I wasn't sweating and thus, did not have to worry about odor.

I ate relatively healthy yesterday despite being at bars all night. I ate a Caesar salad from Marie Calendar's in the afternoon, some roasted chestnuts, salted almonds and olives from the first place in SD (I would tell you the name of it, but I really have no idea what it was called), and some sushi from the Tiki Lounge. The only problem I think was that I ate so late at night (we didn't eat until about 10.30). The best part was that I abstained from alcohol last night. I stuck to diet coke and water even after watching the Cubs lose (again), I wanted to drink quite a bit.

As for today, I was supposed to go paddle-boarding and kayaking again, but I did not make it. DM asked what my excuse was and I had no answer. I still have no answer. For some reason, I woke up depressed. I thought that going for a walk would clear my head and I would feel better. This did not happen. I almost felt worse. I really have no idea what it was, but I was in a horrible mood all day. I could not turn off my mind and I kept turning things over and over and just could not shake what I was feeling. This happens to me every so often and I just have to fight through it. I even ate horribly today. My roommate brought me back a Denver Omelette from Ruby's. I knew I should not eat it. I did not want to look at it, but something made me eat it all and the diced potatoes and wheat toast that came with it. Eating that depressed me more because it reminded me how I used to eat because I hated myself and hated how fat I was because I could not stop eating fast food. I took a nap and went for another walk and I am starting to feel a little better. Maybe walking 9.5 miles a day will do that.

I am interested to see what my number is tomorrow and if I am losing weight again.


Dirty Martini said...

Sassy Ho - its great that you are choosing to get up off your rear end and go outside for a walk when you feel low - exercise will always help you feel better & a long usually helps you work things out in your head. That's a great improvement. Also the name of the restaurant where you gobbled the salty nuts was the Confidential - here's the link:

Anonymous said...

Hi Sasha,

This is James, Wen's friend. Don't know if you remember me, I went to one of the company's Christmas Dinners few years back.

Back in college days, I lost 60lbs, and I understand what you are going through. It's hard on your body and your mind. I think it's actually a little too rough on your body to try to lose so much weight in such a short time. Treat yourself nice once in a while. Have a chocolate cake now n' then.

Ask yourself, if you really do lose 100lbs in 100days, are you going to be able to keep up what you've been doing for the last 35 days for the next year? 5years? 10 years? You are making great process, but your mind and body is making this a sprint, instead of a marathon. Don't worry so much about how many lbs you've lost on a daily basis, remember, as you workout, you are gaining muscle mass, and eventually, the pounds won't be coming off as easily, but you'll still be losing fat, you just won't see it on the scale.

Keep up the good work, and keep some treats (low sugar/sugar free if you really insist) at home for days when you're really feeling down.

Anonymous said...

Yo YO Sasha,

it's been a month and I have to say you are doing GREAT!!

Your diet/plan exactly made you feel the difference by not losing your breath and sweating.

You know during these 100 days for sure you will encounter some very depressed moment or number doesn't keep going down as schedule...etc. Trying to go out and stay with your friends that should make you feel better than staying home by yourself (you should make it to kayaking yesterday).

by the way, Cubs lost again and I should've let you or Wen know earlier that we indeed had one extra ticket at game 3 Dodgers stadium. Anyway, Cubs just had a bad moment in these 3 postseason games and they did have a great job in the regular season. Why don't you cheer for Angels with us now? :)


Shalini said...

hang in there guy. you're going through a lot. maybe you should talk to a psychiatrist. it's not easy to deal with what your body is going through. it's a shock to the system. physically and mentally. just stick with it. it can't all be smooth sailing.